Tweets for May 16th to May 31st

  • SO freaking COOL and I want one! DIY Lasers Are Irresistibly Dangerous | Wired.com
  • Unexploded cow / Baked sweet things from three kitchens / A great night with friends. #TuesdaysAreForHaiku
  • The most terrifying word to hear in karate: "Review". Reviews lead to pre-tests, pre-tests lead to a test, tests lead to my Green Belt!
  • You know you’re in software QA when your day is MADE by seeing an error message you’ve never seen before while testing the application.
  • And then having a dev call you to say "that’s a really bad error message, you shouldn’t have seen that".
  • CDC Emergency Preparedness & Response | Preparedness 101: Zombie Apocalypse
  • 30 mins from ‘it’s really dark outside’ to ‘omigosh we’re gonna die! Run for the basement!’ to ‘huh, rain again’.
  • Sunshine driving in / Cicadas perching in trees / A day without rain? #TuesdaysAreForHaiku
  • Is it bad I’m putting more thought into what knitting projects to take this weekend than what clothes to take?
  • Even my desktop wallpaper has stormclouds on it 😦
  • Back to work Tuesday / After Lake of the Ozarks / Can we go back soon? #TuesdaysAreForHaiku

Tweets for May 1st to May 15th

  • Self-striping yarn should come with an addiction warning label, must get to the next stripe! And the next one! And the one after that!
  • Self-striping sock has sapped my will to stop, or do anything else but knit more stripes. Someone stop me! #halp
  • No car coming home / Clock ticking in the silence / Counting down the days. #TuesdaysAreForHaiku
  • No QA issue should EVER have to be sent back to the coder SIX TIMES for fixes. Twice is too many, six deserves a firing.
  • Frost on grass, cars, and roofs, on MAY 4th! Can we have spring proper now please?
  • Creating a new JIRA project with the "Beware of the Kangaroo" project icon. Wonder how long before Boss changes it back…
  • Why is the diameter of a knitting needle listed in millimetres, but the length in inches? Can’t we standardise on metric for everything?
  • They say they’re putting up drywall in the office next door, but it sounds like they’re torturing a Dalek.
  • Racing for some of / The last $3.89 gas / Before the price hike. #TuesdaysAreForHaiku #adaylate
  • The coffee machine is dead, how do you run a software company with no coffee? The Boss is not happy and one guy already went home…

    Tweets for April 16th to April 30th

    • TopatoCo: Keep Calm And Shoot Them In The Head Print.
    • The Nutella experiment: toasted hazelnuts cooling before being blended. Not easy to get the skins off.
    • RIP 12 year old blender, you died in the service of a good cause: 3 jars of chunky nutella cooling in the fridge.
    • Those crystal nail files that work so well? No flex in them whatsoever. In other news, glass shards travel further than you think.
    • The empty inbox, / Like a lily pond without / Those annoying fish. #haiku #TuesdaysAreForHaiku
    • Wow. AT&T support says bugger off and call tomorrow, they’re not even going to bother today. Thanks for the customer DIS-service.
    • What did we do to offend you April, that you throw one-inch hail at us?
    • I propose a weekly haiku-a-long on Twitter, the 5-7-5 format. Who’s with me? #TuesdaysAreForHaiku
    • Just realised I tell days from level of ache from karate & sparring, after a 2 week break for injury I have NO IDEA what day it is.
    • "Failure is not an option. It comes bundled with the product." — Ferenc Mantfeld
    • My first computer was a Commodore VIC-20, now the C64 is coming back!
    • Striped towel, yoga mat, T-pins, soggy lace scarf. Settling in for an evening’s blocking.
    • Silent house with cats, / Light switches all in order, / Planning what to bake. #haiku #TuesdaysAreForHaiku
    • Note to self: if attacked by a zombie gorilla, do not attempt to break its neck, it won’t work. Shoot it in the head and move on.
    • My phone has decided we are now in Kellyville, just outside Sydney, Australia. It’s deluded but the Australian place names are fascinating.
    • St Louis drivers PUT YOUR HEADLIGHTS ON so I can SEE you more than 10yds away. Rain-coloured cars please re-spray yourselves orange.

    Tweets for April 1st to April 15th

    • List of April 1st RFCs on Wikipedia
    • OH at least twice a week: "I’m not being argumentative but… (argue argue argue f-bomb argue disagree)"
    • What does one wear, on Casual Friday, to an interview with Federal Investigative Services about a security clearance one already got?
    • There’s a recipes microformat! "Recipes that are not for stuff that’s meant to be eaten by humans are out of scope."
    • Hot sweet milky tea soothes many a troubled brow.
    • Attended Monroe County Sheep and Craft festival in Waterloo, IL. I may now need a Mini Rex rabbit or seven.
    • Bought a dress today & doubled my collection of nice dresses. It looks very smart, professional, & unlike anything else I wear.
    • Why do women’s business outfits lack pockets? I dislike wearing my security badge around my neck like a cow bell.

    Tweets for March 16th to March 31st

    • Why is it considered OK for doctors to be over an hour late? No other profession gets away with that & it messes up your whole day.
    • By coincidence I brought British Flapjacks to work on the day of my performance review. Raise now please?
    • Begone caffeine headache, the power of tea compels you.
    • First ribeye steak of the year on the newly cleaned grill.
    • Glass shards from an exploded light bulb travel further than you think.
    • White blossoms on trees and snow on the ground. Must be St Louis in the spring.
    • Hi, Winter? Yeah, I think you forgot something. Like the fact you’re supposed to be GONE and take your snow with you, you unwanted guest!
    • Have successfully blended English and American personas: will talk to random strangers, but only about the weather.
    • In self-imposed quarantine on day 2 of zombie death cold. Send tea and crumpets.
    • Out of the office for two days and some weasel has half-inched my spare chair! Visitors will have to stand.

    I’ve been quiet lately because I’ve been ill and tired. In theory, I’m better now.

    Tweets for March 1st to March 15th

    • Blinky screen RIGHT BY MY FACE while new hard drive sorts itself out. The blink tag was banned under the Geneva Convention for a reason!
    • My phone thinks I am at an Amtrak station in Alexandria VA, & has set its timezone accordingly. Bloody GPS won’t stick on real location.
    • Birthday t-shirt from @psh SELECT finger FROM hand WHERE id=3. Also bacon salt. Thank you!
    • How can I be reasonably fit in the karate studio but craptacularly awful at running? Did 20 minutes & it felt like an hour.
    • Microsoft says stop using IE6. Personally I’m not keen on IE7 or IE8 either. #teamfirefox #teamchrome
    • English English for Americans #1: higgledy-piggledy (adj), a disorganised mess
    • English English for Americans #2: jiggery-pokery (n), trickery, messing around, how you solve a tricky problem
    • Answering physics questions for a story about a magical duel is fun!
    • Adjusting scone recipe for ovens that actually oven when they’re told to. Have also exceeded minimum level of mess required to get an apron.
    • Writing the start of a story while two loaves of bread rise in the kitchen. First bread of the year, first story of the year.
    • Daylight Saving Time is evil, I’m getting up in the dark again. I heard an owl this morning, lucky thing still thought it was 5am.
    • Happy pi (π) day, America & Canada, it’s 3/14! Britain has to wait till 22 July for their pi day. Go forth & circulate.
    • 1st thought after tetanus shot: I can handle raw wool & sharp combs safely! 2nd thought: Ow. Really ow!

    Tweets for February 16th to February 28th

    • Scheduling application performance test, AKA "when can I kill the server and how long will it take to die?" Sometimes I love my job.
    • Work PC is bricked, reduced to pen & paper. Never needs rebooting, runs silently, UI needs some gloss but basically sound.
    • Note to self: karate is not ballet, stop pointing your toes and flex them instead. Looks much more intimidating!
    • Flapjacks on the cooling rack, whole wheat scones in the oven (for the oat allergic), kitchen cleaned up afterwards. I feel all domestic!
    • Home made whole wheat scones for breakfast. Network Guy suggested putting a slice of bacon in the scone. Seriously considering it!
    • Gasoline in St Louis: $3.19/gallon. Gasoline in Britain: $8.04/gallon (current exchange rate & using US 3.78 litre gallon)
    • I’m too short for regular length pants, but too tall for petites. How is this possible? Where are the pants that fit?

    Tweets for February 1st to February 15th

    • Why do Addi needles come in non-standard sizes for the US1 & US2? "Standard" means everyone, including you.
    • People on Etsy: If it has SIX sides, it’s not an octagon, it’s a HEXAGON. Seen this on 2 pieces already and it’s annoying. And WRONG
    • Seriously considering a scarf made from silk hankies after seeing the mittens yarnharlot made.
    • I have 6 red roses & stargazer lilies on my desk from @psh. Happy 17th date-iversary for tomorrow love!
    • Getting white silk hankies (for spinning), knitting them unspun into a little scarf, then dying it with tea, is this a good or bad idea?
    • I am informed that my posse name is "The Bodacious Double Tea". Must figure out a way to get this into everyday conversations.
    • There’s cold, there’s bloody cold, and there’s "what were you THINKING going out in that?" Today is the latter, -11C on my drive to work.
    • Is it un-American of me to still use Celsius? I find Fahrenheit confusing.
    • -11 Celsius = 12 Fahrenheit = 262 Kelvin. Kelvin sounds warmest.
    • Knitting with unspun silk pulled off a mawata (silk hankie) is WEIRD in a good way. Love the results so far, and it’s froggable! Bizarre…

    Tweets for January 16th to January 31st

    • Breakfast included Yorkshire Gold tea made with boiling water, milk, and a little sugar. I have renewed my Englishness.
    • What’s the weirdest thing you keep in your car? Mine is a spare mouth guard for karate sparring.
    • After you’ve been sick there should be at least 2 weeks of wellness. Back to back colds begone! I don’t have time for you.
    • Overheard in the status meeting: "Put in an expense report for pain and suffering after that phone call" "What’s the going rate for that?"
    • Drove the SUV to work, had forgotten how nice it is to have a height advantage while driving. It’s the only height advantage I ever get.
    • If there was a Guinness Book Of Records category for "Most lip balms lost/laundered/tumble dried in a month", it would have my name on it.
    • Cannot face knitting lace scarf with greyish yarn in greyish weather, switching to "poke you in the eyes" turquoise blue instead.
    • Picking a necklace organiser for the dresser based on how hard it would be for a cat to knock over. Sod the aesthetics, give me sturdy!
    • Absolutely LOATHE filling out govt security clearance forms. Piles of data to be looked up, docs to copy, privacy to wave goodbye to…
    • Pondering knitting pattern for mouth guard used in karate sparring. Needs to accommodate drool and be washable. Very washable.
    • To clarify, I meant a small knitted BAG to HOLD my mouth guard, not an actual knitted mouth guard. That would be weird, and taste funny.
    • Sparred someone half my age & a foot taller last night. Probably a score draw, we both came out grinning.

    Tweets for January 1st to January 15th

    • Bread rising bucket ordered to replace the one I accidentally melted in the oven. Whole wheat/Asiago cheese bread turned out OK despite it.
    • First seeds of a new novel idea to follow on from the 2009 NaNoWriMo novel arrived today. Do I wait for November? Or write it now?
    • Merrily using the kitchen floodlights safe in the knowledge there’s a gadget to change light bulbs on a 13ft ceiling without a ladder.
    • Would the person in the office who is NOT sick please stand up? We have some cold germs to share with you. We know you’re out there.
    • Have found both the Turner seascape and the undiscovered Shakespearean sonnet today. Enough with the cold already.
    • xkcd: How to Write Good Code. Which loop are you on?
    • Have a minor knitting injury I hope I will not die from (http://xkcd.com/369/). Double point needle poked my foot, some blood, I’m OK.
    • Why is my iPod out of charge when I need it most? How does it know? Is there another iPod that’s always charged & can I trade for that one?
    • 296 downloads in 2 days of my new Ravelry knitting pattern, Orwell Bridge scarf! Wow!
    • Re-inking fake freckle on left hand for karate group class, then sparring. My first sparring class since June, a bit scared of epic fail.
    • I survived sparring class! 8 fights, including 3 in a row. Next challenge: remembering to breathe while sparring.